Wondering….

July 24, 2006

I wonder if she knows… Does she know that I know her secret? I know why she chose her name for this journal? Does she know who I am or why I am here? Does she even know that I am?

Then I have to wonder, how could she not know? Here I am, as evidence of my existence, I am here. How could anyone not know? But perhaps, she doesn’t because she tends to block out such things that would shake up her own fragile little world. She stays quietly in her tiny room, not looking out the tiny window… Why did she build the window if not to look out? But look “out” she does not. The fear inside her little room is that what is…. Is not what she perceives it to be. If she were to look out that tiny window and find things… Different… From her own small beliefs, what would become of her little room? How would she survive, knowing of me?

What if, my asking these questions makes me just as unstable as she? But of course, that is silly ramblings… I am the stable one. I am the glue that holds the world together. If not for me… What? …..

Shadow.

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Fascinations

July 24, 2006

As I put this pen to paper, I find myself fascinated with the color change of the paper. Each movement of my hand produces a new line, or shape, be it round or square in it’s form. Or squiggled on the once blank page, each shape takes form and becomes what we know as letters. When put with other shapes and squiggles, the letters link and become words. Information. Suddenly the blank page contains information that was not shared only moments before. Amazing!

Why do we share this information with ourselves or perhaps with others? Why now, after such silence before? Maybe the silence was for only a moment in time, or perhaps it was years, never-the-less, why do we chose to put pen to paper now at this point in time? Is there a reason? Does there need to be a reason? For me, I think there is and it is needed.

I choose now to share information with this page because now is when I have it. Tomorrow I may not have this information any longer, simply because it is a passing thought that may pass and be forgotten. Only now, it will not be forgotten because this page will remember it for me. Alas, this is why I take pen to paper at this time.

And just what is this all so important, must be preserved, information that I have chosen to share with a once blank page? What could possibly be so informative that I would have to stop my normal activities and take up pen as a sword? The answer is simply this:

I am fascinated with the written word…. Not the world saving information that one would have hoped for, with such a grand introduction, I know, but it is what it is. My information.

And so here on these blank pages, I will continue to convey information as I deem necessary with the written word and I will continue to be fascinated by each shape and color.

Flaming Red Roseate…..

Disclaimer:

July 24, 2006

This blog is totally fictional. Any resemblance to anyone or anything in the real world is not real and should not be taken as a sign that it is real. The truths in this blog are only in my own head or heart or where ever such truths should be stored. They are my truths, or half truths or non-truths as I see them and should not be taken literally or at all. Since these truths and non-truths alike belong to me, then taking them would be considered a theft in many modern day societies, so this act of “taking” my truths, half truths and non-truths can not be condoned.

Some of the opinions in this blog may be my opinions and can be excepted as such… However, they may not be my opinions because they may not even be real. This blog may not even be real. Heck, I may not even be real. So all opinions in this possibly not-real blogs should be taken with a grain of salt, (not to use to rub in wound, however.) and should be viewed as possibly real feelings or possibly just the made up ramblings of someone who doesn’t even exist. Take it as you will.

Flaming red roseate.